Sunday, May 19, 2013

The Future, Explained

So I finally got around to watching the Star Trek reboot from 2009 and while I found it reasonably entertaining, JJ Abrams certainly went out of his way to make it feel like we were back in the Sixties.

Kirk spent the movie trying to screw everything in a miniskirt (which handily enough, all of the women were wearing), all of the non-white people were safely occupying non-powerful positions off-screen, and although the men of the future are allowed to get older, balder, and wrinkly, all of the women of the future have a Lifeclock and report to the "Carrousel" to be vaporized at age thirty.

At least that's what it felt like to me.

Even though I think it's in fact just a case of really regrettable casting, the lack of racial diversity could possibly be explained away by hypothesizing some sort of evolutionary bottleneck some time between now and when the film takes place. For example, if the entire population of the earth was killed off except for the executives in Hollywood and their current wives, one would achieve approximately the correct on-screen racial mix. So there, we've explained that away.

What I was having a harder time with was the lack of women in the future. Sure, the lack of strong female characters is just bad writing, but it appears that the actual ratio of men to women is skewed way beyond India/China birthrates. So you either have to assume that they've found to a way to gestate in a box, or you have to assume that all of the women are just... somewhere else.

Then it hit me -- this is the perfect thing to use as the premise for the next Star Trek television show. I've seen suggestions that they base the next show on Starfleet Academy, but I think you'll agree that this will have a larger audience. Without further ado, I present to you

Star Trek : Harem World

In ST:HW the audience is introduced to one of the worlds that contain all of the women that might be traveling the galaxy or governing worlds if they were able to worry their pretty little heads about things like that. Instead, these young nubile women compete in fashion contests attended by Starfleet captains on vacation. 
When not walking the catwalk, the women visit the "Carrousel" to cheer the vaporization of the older women when even Botox and plastic surgery can't keep the older women looking attractive enough.

Sadly, this show is probably more likely to get made than a JJ Abrams Star Trek film with strong female characters. And that is depressing me today.

Anyhow, on a more positive note, the puzzle is done...

Maybe I should just write a screenplay.


jeff said...

what happened to the regular updates? When you stay in your PJs all week, do you lose track of bacon day?

Theresa B (of Nebulopathy) said...

Bacon day (which isn't bacon day here) was a holiday, so I took the day off.

Or possibly I had nothing to say, or even less to say than I usually do.

Or maybe I was still irritated at JJ Abrams and was waiting for someone else to be irritated with me.

Choose your own ending...