Sunday, February 17, 2013

Disaster Preparedness

Well, I'm sure you'll all be very pleased to know that the world has not ended in the two weeks that I've been funemployed, but I'm now finally prepared for a natural disaster just in case -- as long as you define "prepared" as "keeping an expensive backpack with power bars in the trunk of my car". Water, I won't have, and a source of heat will also be lacking, but I'll be able to do an excellent imitation of an old Jiffy-Pop popcorn pack with my emergency blankets. Also, if my roof caves in I won't have any pet food anywhere I can get to, so the cats will likely gang up and dismember me long before I run out of MREs.

I'll be the first to admit that those pre-packaged emergency supply backpacks are completely overpriced and likely don't have the things I would need, but after about five years of snubbing them because I could do something similar for half the price and yet never actually getting around to doing so, I finally just bought one. So there.

This might have been brought on by the temporary irrationality that hits me every time I set foot in the hardware store. For example, every time I go into Home Depot, I'm convinced that I'm capable of doing home repairs, despite all evidence to the contrary. If my house had an independent source of income I'd suspect it of bribing the thief who stole all the tools out of my garage.

Anyhow, in the event of a natural disaster, everyone is invited to my place. I'll have a useless first aid kit, latex gloves, and some sort of food that is supposed to stay good unrefrigerated for the next three years. You might want to bring water with you.

Also, I'd recommend bringing along some cat food just in case...


2 comments:

jeff said...

Let me try that again:

So after years of commuting hours per day you're getting some supplies for the back of your car?

Are you already going house crazy?

Theresa B (of Nebulopathy) said...

They're just in the back of my car because I figure my car is more likely to withstand a natural disaster than anything else I own.

Or, more likely, my car with all of my emergency supplies will get stolen in the next week.