Thursday, January 22, 2009

Devaluation

Okay, so as a contractor I don’t have to play the evaluation game.

However, some people have to go through the annual (or worse, quarterly) evaluation process. It’s painful, but you might learn something, even if that something is that your boss is a jerk and you hate your job.

Then there are those people who work for places that require evaluations to be done, but don’t hire people willing to do them. Yet evaluations still need to be done since HR requires them. In that situation, it’s not unheard-of for employees to be asked to write their own evaluations. And if you write your own evaluation, do you really think anyone is going to read it?

If this applies to you, feel free to adapt from the template below.

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For the third year in a row, [Employee] was a model employee. Full of wit and wisdom, she inspired everyone around her to be a team player in the track field of life. [Employee] willingly took on extra tasks beyond the scope of her job requirement when necessary, including performance self-evaluations and informal managerial evaluations.

Possibly the most important cog in the organizational wheel, [Employee] thrives despite occasional intentional sabotage from her direct supervisor. [Employee] required no direct supervision, and indeed was offered none this year. In fact, [Employee] was able to function perfectly well without the manager who is responsible for this evaluation.

In short, [Employee] deserves the highest level of praise and a raise.

Sincerely,
[Manager]

2 comments:

A Free Man said...

I just had my performance review at work. I think that they were surprised when I pointed out things that I could improve at. Got a raise though, so maybe I confused them into giving me more money.

Theresa B (of Nebulopathy) said...

Maybe you should come up with a bigger list of things to improve upon next time... You might get a raise and a promotion.